The Taxonomy of Art.

Click on image to supersize.

As part of our ongoing mission to make art more accessible to a wider audience, the staff here at C-Mon recently went into mind-meld mode to produce this handy new taxonomy that categorizes all art into one of two easy-to-understand categories: stoner and douche. So the next time you find yourself at a high-falutin’ Chelsea cocktail party and someone makes a tangential reference to Fluxus, you’ll be able to add to the discussion by stating, “Hey, that’s stoner and douche!”

Special thanks to Ben B, El Celso and San Suzie for their contributions to this important scholarly project.


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  2. Jeff Geib

    This REALLY needs to be on a t-shirt
    and MUST BE featured in one of your famous giveaway contests
    and I REALLY need to win.
    Just, you know, as a suggestion.

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  4. eko

    Very good !!! Bravo !

    Stencil is in the right section to me. But some will not enjoy.
    “Cuban doctor art” WTF is it !?

  5. marshall

    In an extended look over and self reflection based upon your flawless Venn diagram, I unfortunately must admit that I apparently am a douche. Now I guess I need to go get myself a deep V-neck sweater and cry myself to sleep.

  6. c-monster

    @marshall… it probably should be more of a continuum (like the Kinsey scale) than a Venn diagram… we all have a little bit of both. but a continuum would have been a PAIN IN THE ASS to lay out…

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  8. sean

    Personally, I would say that making a venn diagram labeling some aspects of art as “stoner” and some aspects of art as “douche” would put you in the “douche” category.

  9. marshall

    I see your point about a continuum of Stoner-Douche, but even there, unfortunately, I seem to be pretty heavy on the douche-y side of things.

    For some reason my favourite part of this diagram is the fact that Schnabel is on both sides, but doesn’t meet in the middle.

  10. Jim A

    Placing Schnabel in both the Stoner and Douche camps, but excluding him from the region where the groups intersect, is no doubt brilliant in a way I’m not douche-y enough to understand. Bravo.

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  12. MarkD

    Shouldn’t “Art-as-Art” be in the douche bubble. I mean, Ad Reinhardt loved making these sorts of things and was a total douche to the entire art world!

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